I now cry at card tricks.

Dude Dude, I’ve been out of the Blogging thing for awhile. I’m sure all 4 of my followers have been really broken up about it.  No problem I’m back and I’d like to tell you ‘m not that happy.  I’m not happy because I’m a bit out of practice.  My summer movie thing is a little behind. We so totally missed the re-release of Jaws. Not that I haven’t see it 1000 times. So I’ve only  managed Inside Out, which is a pretty good kids movie. I’m not sure how this happened though so but I now cry at EVERYTHING. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve teared up in that movie.  But not just that movie dude, my kids made my watch Steven Universe about a bazillion times I teared up.

Now I’m pretty sure I could cry during Selma (yes I just got around to watching that) balling like a baby. You’ll be happy to know I did not cry during 7 Days of Hell, but it did make me think about Brooklyn 99 which the last episode had me sniffling quite a bit. I can also assure you I have been reading recaps of Grey on both JennyTrout.com and alysbcohen.wordpress.com.  I’ve done a big bit of grieving for my soul after reading their recaps.  It seriously hurts my heart that 50 Shades of Grey is a thing.

chris crocker  111 - SERIOUSLY HURTS MY HEART

I’m a little better on TV totally into Mr. Robot, Last Ship, and the new season of True Detective, well only watch one episode on that but shhh.  Now as much as I love Dwayne Johnson, seriously I want him to have my babies, I could not get into the critically acclaimed Ballers, which is only allowed to have skinny pretty woman in it. If you are a guy its fine but please no ugly b’s.

I promise to be better and now that I know how to create a meme look out!

Why I don’t go out 

I found this post recently. Apparently, I wrote it but never posted. I think it’s important to know a little about me so I’m going to share. You may not feel it in here but I was in a really bad bad bad place at the time. I’m better now, just kidding, I’m still in a bad place just cover it better now.

Hey, pretty baby. Yeah its been awhile but I must not have had a lot of things to say. But let me tell you I recently went out. Naw just kidding I’m out now, and I wanted to let you know about how awesome it was. Totally kidding it was painful! Anyone who knows me knows I hate going out. I have a bit of agoraphobia so going out and “hanging” with people isn’t my thing. You are lucky you can get me to go to work, but I digress.

So recently my sister-in-law’s bday. She’s okay but for the fact, ​she HAS to be the center of attention. If she is not, well no there isn’t a time where she isn’t.  So anyway, we are hanging out with several people out of the 11 people, and I know my sister-in-law, her daughter and almost another woman there. Well all the single ladies get extremely excited when we get a message that a woman we are picking up is bringing two guys, a picture is sent, and everyone goes crazy cause he’s apparently hot. I’m not allowed to see (i.e. I’m too fat and black, black girls don’t get the hot guys). Trust me, show me a movie where the black girl got the hot guy and I’ll show you a poorly constructed movie cause they can’t do it.

How you ever realized you were the day chic?  The useless person?  The one no one cares about it’s a little disconcerting to realize. That you are the one that no one cares about. That you are the one they brought along cause they had to cause there was no one else. I try not to get pissed. I try not to get upset, but it is so damned hard.  It is next to impossible. Next to impossible to realize that besides being the most visible, the most memorable, you are the one everyone chooses to ignore. To hell, you say, you don’t get ignored. I call bullshit.  The black girl is usually ignored because people are either they are ‘afraid of a girl like that’ or they don’t know ‘what to say’ to them.

Wow, why does this upset me so? This happens every time I go out. Well, the few times I’ve gone out. Twice it’s​ happened twice. I’ve been treated like this before. I should be used to it or at least not used to it but tolerant of it. But I’m not. When do you think it will change. Keep in mind it is most likely cause I’m old and not cause you’re I’m black and I have total resting bitch face. It’s because you are no longer fuckable. Does that make you feel better?​ Not really, although that should. I’m not fuckable and haven’t been for about 10? 15? years when did this happen? When did I go from fuckable to writing about fuckable people?​  Maybe you should get used to that. Not fuckable. Be happy, no more playing, awkward flirting, you are with someone who loves you, (won’t or can’t duck you) but loves you. Yeah

You know you can tell me everything right? Ew just not that

Just recently my daughter was in the hospital. She’s fine now thanks for asking and of course her school was a total dick about it but you know you put up with that, anyway…

She was in the hospital and due to a whole lot of people not listening to us we were there a couple of two three times. General practitioner, ER (twice) and finally admitted. Now I know she’s a teenager and I know teenagers do things that not all adults especially their parents don’t like, but my kids suffer from two things, well the suffer from a lot of things but we are going to focus only on a few.  One of them is a very chatty father.  I cannot tell you how chatty their father is. I would never suggest committing a crime with him, for one he is a law abiding citizen, the other reason, HE WOULD BLAB IT TO EVERYONE! Seriously dude cannot shut up.  If you met my family, you will know us by the amount of chatter. So my kids couldn’t keep anything from me if they tried because they can’t pure and simple fact they would blab it.

The other reason they can’t keep things from me??

It was slightly frustrating to be kicked out of the room so the doctor could “talk” to my daughter. Which I guess but really shouldn’t we be encouraging open communication? Apparently not.

Now not the day after my mother-in-law drops on by (I foolishly thought to see after my daughter) but instead it was to complain about how she is stressed, too much is going on in her life and although she is married, her husbands children are causing lots of distress. Well that sounds awful, you can go. So she’s unable to have a good talk with him, so apparently you talk to me (I’m compassionate times 10)

She also happens to tell me all about her other granddaughter who is also at a loss for someone to talk to and it was suggested she should visit a psychologist.

You're sad and depressed? Here let me help you with that

While I whole hardheartedly encourage you to get some help if you truly feel that you need it and I am not knocking psychiatry in any way, I just want you to stand way over there as far away from as possible. I’ve got enough crazy in my life right now.

Good Luck to you.

Piece of Pop

Welcome internet and to the people I begged to be here and those who accidently typed in the wrong word or phrase into their browser and ended up here.

This being my first post and since I’m relatively new to the whole blogging universe I’ll be short

After racking my brain, I truly couldn’t think of anything that I can contribute with stops me from posting to Cracked or Buzzfeed (my two favorite places for useless information) or any place where I think everyone wants my opinion because even though I think I’m fabulous surprisingly enough not everybody does; imagine my surprise.

But since I have a TON of useless information in my brain I figured I would pass it on to muddle your brains as well.  That way the more people that think like me the more people I can talk to instead of having to avoid the whole human race.

So let’s talk about movies because that isn’t something that a lot of people talk about.  I just want to do an open letter to Hollywood and ask them to please stop doing certain clichés.  There is no need for yet another ‘Pulled out of retirement’ movie. Don’t look at me like you don’t know what I mean and have not idea what I’m talking about cause you know you do:

John Wick*

3Days to Kill

The November Man

The Equalizer

Taken

Taken 2

Taken 3

A Walk Among the Tombstones

The Drop

Stolen

Erased

The Prince

Olympus has Fallen

The Art of the Steal, just to name a few.

Now I’m not saying any of these movies stink or that they are any good. *I personally cannot get enough of Keanu Reeves and am very upset he doesn’t realize we are destined to be together and he needs to stop all this Hollywood run around and come home to me, but I digress.

 

Can we think of any reason why we need so many retirement movies? Yes I still believe Keanu, Liam, Aaron, John and all the others have a lot of life left in them. I do not discount someone because of their age. But let’s also not discount someone because of their gender or color of their skin or youth.

 

I look at a lot of the movie web sites and there are always talk of “women” movies in the works but the script isn’t right. Truly, Really, Honestly, Seriously, are you kidding me? You are telling me Liam Neeson losing his family movie after movie had a better script then one they could write for Black Widow, Wonder Woman or whatever they hell they were trying to get Hailey Barry to do after that horrible James Bond movie? Well maybe we dodged a bullet on that one.

 

We can remake Fantastic Four, RoboCop, Total Recall, Green Lantern and make Baywatch into a movie but we can’t get more people of color into movies that don’t cast them in a comedic light? Yeah two things I’ll watch Dwayne Johnson paint my house (one because it really needs it and two because I hope he takes off his shirt) and the other thing yes I recognize I’m bitching about a remake when they took About Last Night and remade it with an African American cast. Hush, just hush.

 

I suggest letting them know we are as mad as hell and we are not going to take it anymore and stay away from any reboot, reimagining or remake that Hollywood keeps vomiting out. Unless of course it has Keanu in it, or the Rock. Maybe we should just make our own movies, our own TV shows our own books.  Now if it were just that easy.

Hello world!

Let’s start blogging. Talking and doing stuff that normal people do. Sound like a plan. But just so I can keep this up you have to tell two friends and they’ll tell two friends and they’ll tell two friends and so on and so in and so on.